Day 363

Survived one whole day without forgetting anything. Turned everything off, brought my lunch to school, didn't leave briefcase at home - woo hoo! I am sure I have many rough days to look forward to as Lil Bit gets bigger, sleeps less and starts MOVING. Never underestimate the joy of knowing the baby can't get into stuff yet. I know it's coming, but for today, I just wanna crash. She fell asleep in her car seat on the way home. Am I a rotten mom for leaving her in the seat for her nap? She hasn't slept all day and I wanted time to actually eat. Anyone else notice a baby can be quiet and happy until mommy has food? Can she smell the food or just sense I might actually get to eat without bouncing her on my shoulder? I am already missing the extra pair of hands to get her when I am in the middle of something, just worn out or would like five minutes alone in the powder room without worrying that the dog is licking her head again. I have survived a deployment as a girlfriend/fiancee, one as a wife, and now one as a mother - can I be done yet? Ugh.

I found another picture of my husband on Facebook, but still no emails. This first part is hard. We haven't set up a pattern or gotten into habits yet. I don't know when he might call or if he'll call soon. Previous deployments, Kuwait was a bus stop to Iraq, but Chad thinks he might be there training for a little longer. I wonder if it has really hit me yet. I may just be running on fumes and when I have a few seconds, the truth will crash down like a tsunami. I am just going to enjoy my little trip down this river called Denial!

Met another blogger/army wife. She is having a rough few days. This is her first deployment and feels a little lost in a new job and alone. Plus some of her experiences with army wives have been less than positive. I wonder why so many of us get negative or gossipy? Maybe the complaining and gossip keeps  them busy or takes the focus off the deployment stress? I don't know for sure, and some people just have to be in the center of all the drama, but I guess I hope I can an example for her of how to handle the separation and stress with grace.